If there ever was a blue collar “everyman” hero in gaming, that crown would have to sit firmly on one man’s head – Mario. The man has had more jobs than pretty much anyone in all of gaming. Here is a look at his top ten professions that adorn his resume, in no particular order.
Carpenter
The job that started it all, who can forget Mario’s first foray into the working world. Problem was, whenever he would scale up the big red construction site, a crazy ape always seemed to ruin his day. It was even in this job we saw Mario’s only outing as a game villain in Donkey Kong Jr. Looks like the pressure got to him.
As seen in: Donkey Kong, Donkey Kong Jr.
Plumber
Ah yes, the classic. This is the one job that our rotund old friend is known for, but was he all that good? As Jesus of Nazareth is not really known as a carpenter, Mario must have been a lackluster plumber. There is some evidence of this theory if you take the cartoon the Super Mario Bros. Super Show as canon, in that Mario’s ineptitude in pipe fixing transported him to a magical land. While a nice little diversion, I doubt too many Brooklynites would really care to have that happen whilst sitting on the toilet reading the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.
As seen in: Mario Bros., Super Mario Bros.
Space Explorer
One of Mario’s newest job opportunities has got to be one of his most exciting. Not only do we see him discovering all sorts of small planetoids and meteors, but helping a space princess has got to be a good thing for a resume. It must pay well too, as it seems like just about everyone from the Mushroom Kingdom, including side-kick dinosaurs seem to want to be in on the action.
As seen in: Super Mario Galaxy
Dinosaur herder
They say that nothing beats the life of a cowboy. Awake at sunup and moving cattle around the plains before most people even get up in the morning. Imagine how hard Mario had it when he found out that he was tending to a flock of Yoshi! These little dinos seem to be a handful in most games, but Mario always seems up to the task.
As seen in: Super Mario World
Trash Man
Despite initially being forced to clean up toxic waste due to an imposter besmirching his name, Mario did the job well and even carried on long after he was proven innocent. While the water pack may look a bit Ghostbusters, it suited the pudgy New Yoker well.
As seen in: Super Mario Sunshine
Referee
When many think of a famous Italian man in the ring, most will think of the “Italian Stallion” Rocky balboa, but those of us that are gamers may think of our good old buddy Mario. While he never laced up any boots, Mario did a great job keeping order for the biggest ticking time bomb ever in Mike Tyson. Note, no ears were bitten off during his watch.
As seen in: Mike Tyson's Punch Out!
Damsel in distress
For one night only Mario found himself in the very situation that the lovely Princess Peach historically finds herself in. While locked up, I wonder if Mario dreamed of a much bigger, beefier plumber to rescue him? Probably not.
As seen in: Super Princess Peach
Demolitions expert
With Mario’s expert use of bombs and other explosives in many of his games, one would wonder why he only did it professionally a small handful of times.
As seen in: Wrecking Crew
Racecar driver
Move over Michael Schumacher, there is another racing veteran wanting some recognition for his illustrious career. While not the fated man on four (or even two!) wheels, he is a master of driving whilst juggling all manner of dangerous weapons.
As seen in: Mario Kart Series
Time Traveler
Being a big fan of time traveling myself, It’s good to see that Mario gave it a shot at one point, shame the game was utter garbage!
As seen in: Mario's Time Machine
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